Strahd 6: Out of Body Experience

In a. Land plucked from time and space, surrounded by a fog that lets not escape. Be wary every adventure for the dangers hidden in every corner. To the castle you must go to throw an ancient evil on your own. But cautiously, he knows you're coming. He smells the flesh of blood. You're carrier. Trust no one in this land of twilight, and you might survive to see true sunlight against all odds. If you prevail. Heroes true, they will sing of you to end your tale. But if you fall heavily, your soul is now trapped.

High atop a mountain peak sits Rabiloft Key. It's grand old doors open. But you an invitation so tarry not. There should be no delay. The master awaits you this day. Welcome laws ladies, nobles and surfs, prepare your spirits to be mad as we enter the Curse of Stroud. What's he doing? Hi guys, and welcome. Welcome to Six or Nine, You Bastard, a podcast made by. A. Podcast. We'll try again. We're being run by an idiot. Wait, no, we.

Can see that. So flapping your arms like this? Hi guys, and welcome to is that A6 or 9A podcast made by idiots from the idiotically challenged. That's me. What type of podcast is it? Because you didn't say what? Do you think it? Is Carl has a chest infection, so I'm really sorry for all the really fucking annoying there's going. To be cost. Looking forward to editing that. Hi guys and welcome to is that A6 or 9AD and D podcast made by idiots? Hey, there we go. It's been a while. I haven't, idiot, sorry.

I am your Dungeon Master and host Carl Nicholson and joining me today we have.

What? Who are you? Me. Matt, my name's Matt. Who are you playing? No, no, I'm Yvonne. Yvonne Dang kills. My. Name's. Matt, I think.

Maria. I'm playing will be shady. Alex. Alex, that's the loudest you've ever been on this podcast. And ever will be. Yeah, for sure. I'm going to go quiet again.

Now I'm playing Malice Enfield. That's Jack. It's been a hot minute. So yeah, it's been a while since we last we last in the dungeon. How are we all feeling Kind. Of hungry. Kind of hungry, yeah. So I'm not going to lie, any housekeeping we want to do is a second. She waved all her food in front of us and then took her off the table. I, I don't have to worry, look at all this. House I can. Just go in the house and you're here to eat if I need to. I came prepared. There's a difference. I didn't because I have been inspired by your wife and I got up at 6:00 to go for a run this morning and I didn't have time to eat.

She went for a run this morning so that I had to take Sam to school. I think it's genius, Savage, but at least you got to have a go at the teaching assistant, so. But yeah, I, I had a great, great, great week. Yeah, I went to Wales. It was nice just sitting on a mountain. Eat in Beling which? Mountain. I don't know, we're in Ponty Pole, OK, which honestly, it's wonderful. It's, it's the, it's the diss of Wales like. It's just we know. Miserable 1980s You want to. Say mining town like. Suburban, yeah, it was a mining town, but we went to we went to the big.

Pit Big pit's great. Big pit's great. You were like. The tour guide was great. She was like, really good, like talking to Sam. Yeah, Big Pit's really good. If you're ever in the area I highly recommend going to Big Pit. It's really interesting. You have to go down like actually into an actual coal mine. They have to take all of your phones and shit off of you because you don't have batteries in there because you could spark it, set fire to a place which is. Me and Carl exciting me and Carl actually used to live near Big Pit and it's not that far from where we got married and where his.

No, it's not. We drove past. Where we got married, Yeah, I. Think we drove past the Premier Inn and Sam got all like misty eyed and. Yeah, that's why my auntie and uncle got. Married. They're my favourite people. This is all before I was here. Yeah, yeah, I absolutely would have promoted Honestly. Honestly, I would have promoted you to maid of honour. You have no idea what I had to do. Yeah, suck it, whoever it was. Yeah, exactly. That's my point. So. Yeah, yeah, it's it's weird like no one has a job and same as as my as my brother-in-law who I was staying with said they're all stupid, they're all ugly, they're all inbred as fuck.

Like it is literally dis on the side of the hill. It's my I. Would say it's marginally better than dis because like if you look at the front of his house it is just some dreary. It literally looks like the shittiest state that we grew up on. Yeah, yeah, the Tilbury. But at the back, it's just this lovely mountain you see like the the town like lights twinkling in the distance. And there's like a a shell garage that burned down a few years ago. There's a guy getting stabbed for heroin behind it. Is the mountain well, Did you go up pen a fan by some chance?

Fucking no. They live on a mountain. Everything's on a mountain, so they're just wherever, Wherever he lives is where I was. No, it's not a kind of fan, but you said you went up a mountain. No, no, I sat in his house, which is on a mountain. I didn't go climbing a mountain. Jesus. Christ I. Was on holiday. You know whose house is amazing is Malcolm, Dad's cousin, where they live in the valley. They've got, it's like it used to be a shop. So it's like 3 or 4 stories and you come out on I think the third story and there's a massive balcony and it is just mountains.

Yeah, my brother in law's wife's family's house in Poland is like that. It literally looks like a bond layer. I really want to. Go to but but it's all basements. It's really strange. I want to go to Poland anyway. Go. To Should we play D&D? Yeah, that's funny. Unless. You go into the big pit. Yeah, I had a great week in case someone. Oh yeah. How was Comic Con? Did you, did you advertise us so? Good. No, I was we. She can't remember. Wandered around like lots of the artists which was sick. There was a place called Artist Alley and then we walked around like where there was a load of authors, which was really sick as well.

Did you? Dress up. I did not. I'm not you. Could have gone as. Riff. And when everyone said who are you? You could say. It's from this really cool podcast called Is that a Six or a nine? It's on Spotify. You should check it out. I bought. Some great manga I bought, some books she bought. A demon. What's it called the that show that you love? K Pop Demon Hunter is your bag. Oh no, I've already had that. My brother bought it for me. I got, he bought me a bag with like contracts on it. Cool. It's sick.

But I had that. And then I went to a live performance of Spirit Farer, which was incredible and I cried. It was beautiful. Then I came home.

Yeah, you're back here. Yeah, that's, yeah, Well, that's my experience. I had a lovely lovely week drinking vodka and eating sausages and they like came. Yeah, I applied for like 100 jobs. Yes, we get it. Only four jobless scum. Have only had rejections. Do you know what it is? Yeah, and I'm well aware what the problem is. OK, I finished work for the season after doing the the evening Halloween shifts where we got to just dress up and terrify the living shit out of small children. It was absolutely.

Brilliant. Yeah, I saw the pictures. Yeah, it was so good. I went as a girl. Anyway, this is where we'll cut SO. Yes, thank you. It's been a while. Edit point Let's call out all the stuff about Maria's awful fat Gothic X. Yeah, I'm so sorry. My week. Was supporting Fat Gothic X. My week was hunting for a job and speaking to a animation expert who does he did Guardians of the Galaxy and he did all the, you know, in like FIFA when you get the, the advertising boards around the outside of the pitch.

He did all of those and stuff. You're going to say the goal celebrations then. And get. Excited he played FIFA in like 10 years. His wife did Gnomeo and Juliet and the new Lion King and stuff like that. So he has all of our little sound bites and he's going to work on some animation for us. I also have another artist drawing up character images for us as well for our. Socials. Yeah, they're doing it for free. What? Yeah, wow. You know, no, we're not doing well. He's working the boy. Our boy is working for a burner.

Yeah, he was Carl's best man, so OK, he's like. I remember him too. He did the slow motion 3 DFX for Drax's flight scene and the prison barge When the when the when the when the gravity gets turned off and Drax is like flowing through the air. He. That one person was left to do that. Yeah, he did. He did. He did the visual effects. He also did ATV show didn't he? He did the intro for the aluminous I think it's called. No, it's not on Netflix. It's not called that, but yeah, he did the intro for ATV series so it was really cool.

Anyway, I'm here. For free. Yeah, I'm woo. But my point is we we have one artist who's just drawing some some characters and things for our for our socials. So shout out for Kim Doodle because she will want the shout out. Cool. Well, we'll shout out when she's done it. I actually tried to add us to a podcast Supper in It where you like throw up episodes of your podcast but my phone didn't really work and so I just kept mashing the button and then I got like 100 messages from their flood bot because you're only supposed to add like 2 episodes every month or something.

I can't remember the exact rules. So I got banned from. That excellent. You know what's why? It's like there's literal fucking Nazis that are allowed to post it on there but I got banned. What the fuck? It just 'cause I kept mash in a button 'cause I'm old and feckless. So Oh my listening numbers didn't go. Up. I don't think it's got up yet, but I think you have to like. Reddit welcome. Yeah, if you're if you're a moderator, Reddit, God bless you. For the podcast sharing self Reddit, I do apologise.

Yeah, my I did send an e-mail apologising that I'm old and feckless, but I don't know that they read it because they were probably angry. My point before we start, that's why. They have a bot for that yourself. The point I wanted to make before we start was thank you to Kim Doodle on Instagram and oh Witch mouse wizardry. Yeah, for doing us a beautiful map, which is on our Instagram. Yes. And to our friend who is going to do the animating, who I need to check. We can put his name in the podcast.

Cool. I'm sure he'll be fine. Let's start right. It's been 20 minutes so. Good Housekeeping. Good, Wanda. Just be just to like, get all the shit out before we start, you know? So do we remember what happened last time? No, as I said, my notes are very. Short. Editing, shaking over your notes so it's like I I already know. Editing note. My session 5 notes were so like concise that I've had to scribble out the five and write 6 on the blank piece of paper. I didn't write the main thing that was important which.

Was that you found a wheelbarrow? That I found a wheelbarrow, yeah. Oh yeah. I'm magically blind. Oh yeah.

Could be worse. I'm dead, Is there? A recap what? It's the last. Session guys, you were able to take the corpse out of the house 5 yards down the road before Will discovered a black carriage, decided to get into it and was kidnapped. And then he was killed by Strat after Strat tried to get him to be a turncoat and work against the party actively. He failed and so therefore we'll die. And then the surviving party members Malice got blinded as a result for interfering with the Fasani trying to curse I. They made no attempt to rescue me either, really.

They tried. They tried. In our defence, I went on a very effective and reasonable fact finding, information gathering mission. I then joined malice. It was in the process of getting blinded and then as soon as you got blinded you got thrown off. Yeah, it's just so hard done by. You got blinded. I'm dead. You offered to sell her into like slavery or something. I think it's a fair assumption. That I've died. Well, I mean, I think. You guys were scrubbed? The body yet? So yeah, we actually don't know that you're dead.

We're still in the. Tavern. OK, carry on. Sorry, we're hoping. That the the carriage will turn around and. You're like, yes, I wonder if we'll see him again still. Wait for Will to come back. We tried, we tried, we tried to shoot it. I shot, it's going to work. I shot at a car. I don't know what more I'm supposed to do. That's. How we're supposed to catch up with a carriage? But it works for ICE shooting a car that's leaving, so I don't know why I should do anything else. Yeah, Strike was not happy about the fact that you carved Dick and ball symbol.

Maybe it was not. And I, I'm I'm really blind because I was trying to help by trying to figure out the curse that she was trying to curse on. The curse. Ivan. Ivan. Ivan. It was a blindness curse. That happened to her, but someone tried to curse. Yeah, they tried to curse you, which is why I got blind. I know I was. Being sarcastic. OK. Onwards. On facetiousness. So it's a word we pick up. Sorry, Will.

Yeah. You can't you open your eyes. Do I? Yes. Fuck me I think. Didn't the last episode literally end with me as a mangled corpse in the middle of the road? OK cool, but I open my. Eyes. You open your eyes.

Like why is my brother so close to my face? Thank you on your face. And you? Know weird hand? It's the menopause.

You feel, you feel cold and your body and you feel hungover, like all of you like hurts. You're having shocks. Muscle ache and as you set up and take in your surroundings, you see your mangled, broken body on the floor. Oh shit, it's. Like an out of body experience. Yeah, as you look around the village of Baroque. That's inconvenient. The the fog that surrounds the village is kind of like the IS. Kind of like the. Barrier. Yeah. And you see that? You see like faces of decaying and decrepit spirits, some quite recent, some are like quite fresh and clean, but most of them are not.

Hang on, decaying spirits or decaying bodies? The they're, they're ghosts, but they, they give off the physical like appearances of decaying corpses. And as you stand up, you see the the only like main thing, the only main thing to take note of is the church on the northern end of Barovia, where it acts as like a giant Deacon as it's like golden like light emanating from the from the from the building on top of the hill. There's this like glowing light that's coming from the church. Go towards the light wheel that's.

Actually, the one thing they told you not to do. Have you seen the state of my body? I'm fucking hop skipping and jumping. That light, I'm done with that you. Take a step forward. Ouch. You can't really move. It's like your feet are like glued to. Where you so I don't take a step forward. Or you try, it's kind of like, you know, you try, but you can't shuffle really like lift your feet. It's like really, really less like a great weight, like holding you in place. OK, let you take that in for a minute and then we'll cut back to you later to the tablet.

Minded me, I'm trying comestone such. Thing it is just a joke. Unblind me Keep. Just spinning around in circles saying unblind me I'm. Just not swinging. No one could see your actions, so I'll just. Provide. Swabia waves out of the way of the waving blade and she like unfolds her hair. She like flicks out from like behind her shoulders and she gets up and she just walks out of the tub. What the? Fuck hey hey, can I chase? Her you can Alanka Alanka and Mirabel also get up and they kind of like link into your arm as you as you like get up to make after Solovia.

They kind of like link up you you need you need help with the cops my friend. There's. Bigger things on the fucking. Table bitch my friend is blind. You need to fix whatever your. Other friend is dead.

Like gets right in to Malice's face. Like nose to nose, she's fine, she's fine. I want to go for a knee in the balls. Wait. Yeah, well. For accuracy. Roll Attack at disadvantage. Yeah, fair. Enough you go to name and the bulls, but get a bar stool instead.

That's 2. So you're on a one and a. Two. I got a two and a 14. Oh, get the two. Yeah, get it? Yeah. So you didn't hear it because obviously, like there's lots of life screaming and noises and like movement, you don't haven't quite accustomed to the fact that you're blind yet. So when you when when you felt, when you felt Maribel's breath on you, you struck the knee up, but you forgot you were still sitting down. I've got my heel on my dress. So essentially you just slam your knee into the underside of the table.

You've never seen Malice, like come apart. Like she's usually so put together and like, like, what's the fucking word, man? Jesus like. You know what the? Kate is thank. You noble. She's dignified. She. Her hair's coming out everywhere. Her dress is like dirty. She's like proper, like not OK. They're just like, what the fuck is going on? They've linked arms with me, they're carrying me out of the. No, you're you're like you when you got up to make after Sorbia, who has just like walked out, they joined they kind of like joined on today and they're like, yes, you need help, We will help you.

No my my friend needs help and I like wrestle my. House, she'll be fine in the matter of days. Who's the one that's leaving? Some of you served, yeah, but so no, wait. Do you want the cops moved or don't you? Yes, I want the OK we were going to do that. We had we actually sort of figured that out. You need to UN curse my friend here. Whatever it is, you did and you don't do it. We already have a fucking wheelbarrow, we don't need your pissing help. Jesus. Ignore her, she's angry for some reason.

I'm. Blind. You're not blind. You simply cannot see that. There's a difference. Being blind means you are born without sight. I'm going to. Keep swinging until I hit something. How long is she blind for? Until the curse is removed. Yeah, yeah. And. The curse cannot be removed by the Bastani that cast her. Yeah, but I don't know that. So I pull my gun and I I keep it aimed at the floor. But like before you go. This bitch. This bitch. Yeah, it's like you need at least tell me how I can unblind her.

Take it to her, please. Very funny. Then there's only one here in town. If you really believe. What if you really believe that she says she is blind and you really believe what she says that she is? Then take her to take her to her priest, which is candy because we're going up there anyway because there's a body for you to take. I know I can see again. I'm going to break your legs. Really not see how? You like? It I'm. Really not sure that you're the people to be assisting. We we'd kind of come to our own

solution. This is all, it seems like an unnecessary step. It feels like a big misunderstanding. So maybe if you could just unblind Malice and we can get on with our our mission and you can go back to drinking your wine and your lovely Tavern. Remember About puts a hand on Malice's head from behind Macy's still swinging. Nobody, Nobody warned me I'd knock it off. Would would you, my dear? Would you just sit still? He puts his hand. You have to warn a person before you put their you put your hands on them.

He starts massaging like the top of her head. She makes cat noises.

We're just sorry. We're just having flashbacks to our previous manager. What? The fuck? I'm not wrong. You're not wrong. I have tried. I I am. I'm afraid that that I cannot remove the plank that my dear sister has played on you. I am so sorry. Are you? Laughing at me. Yeah, I mean, it is funny. Yes, it is really funny. Yes, I think. It's that funny. When I level up, I'm going to kill you. Yeah, I'm a little concerned that we can't actually do anything about it now is the problem. I think very calmly, like moves towards Malice.

I'm going to help you up. Put your sword away and we will go find you, OK? I'm going to say fuck you and then I'm going to say Ivan and then hold my arm out. I guess I, I I I take Manas arm and I, I guide her out of the Inn, 2000. A. Shit show, yeah. Maribel and Alanka watch you leave and then they sit down and you heard clanking of pewter cups as they chase themselves. You guys are ticket to laughing. Like uproariously barely laughing to these guys. What just happened to you is hilarious. I'm going to.

So evil. Every long rest I get to do it once for free. I'm going to cast telepathic communication on up to two creatures, so I'm going to do the two in there and. You already have that with me. I yeah, you've done it with him so you can find it one more. Which was the one that was laughing at me? They both were, yeah. Which one was the one that was touching my head? Mirabel touched you from behind and Alanka tried to raise you to your feet, but you being blind, you don't know which one it's which and you would have to be rolling.

You would have to be rolling a disadvantage anyway because you have to look in that direction. No, I get to do it. I just get to do that. Oh, OK. Yeah, but I won't. I'll come back for them. They'll be dead. They'll be dead. It's OK. Messed up behind your ears? I I smooth my hair down, brush my dress off. I think that you do those things, but it makes literally a difference your appearance, yeah. I think it did. And that's all that matters, yeah. So is there a time length? A time length time? Period limit.

Yeah, time. Like when does it naturally come to an end it? Doesn't it? Doesn't you're cursed until the curse has moved. Incredible. OK. Is there, is there any way that's malice? Is there any way that your psychic connection to me I can use to guide you other than just telling you what to do? Follow my voice. Wait. Hold on. Yeah. Could you look at archive check or something to like it's more like like just I don't know, give her some soda or something. You. Could tie a bit of rope around or waist and lead her around.

It's more communication than anything so. OK. But I'll just I'll, I'll keep you. Keep my hand on your shoulder. OK, for now that'll have to do. I guess we head back to the Burgmasters. Wait, no, no, no, we're going to go find a priest, right? When do? You leave. Oh yeah. Shit. What? About finding me a priest. When you leave. When you leave the town. You saw it. You see is Mark and Irena being helped by Swarovia who has bought them on the waggon and they they are now placing the burger master's body on the on the on the cart.

That's like I'll tell you why can I meant cart? What cart? This is the one I got from the. Pub, right? Yeah, yeah. OK, Swarovia heard. And she was like OK, cool, I'm going to play with you and then I'll actually go. So she played with you. Now she's actually gone. Gone to. Hell, bitch that that curse me, yes. Interesting. OK, Malice, I need you to keep calm despite what I'm going to tell you. And then so there's somebody helping. As you see that then you you discover Will's broken body unceremonious.

Oh my God. Will.

Oh, no. What? What? No. What's going on? You know what, Melis? You've been having a pretty shitty day.

She won't be sad. It's I kind of like gently remove her hand from my shoulders. They don't, don't move. Just stay here, OK? For the love of God, don't touch anything. Don't, don't move. I Take a knee by Will's body, give it a poke. I. Think remains is. Probably a better word, yeah. Is he obviously dead? Oh yeah, OK, well, a perception where? Did that go?

I've got that paper, that one. If it. Off the table though. OK, Perception. Yeah, 609. Lame. It's A7. Yeah, I'm now, I was hoping if it were a little bit higher that you would have seen the punch marks. Cross me with a stick.

Yeah, with a servant you see like the, you see the obvious injuries, there's brain matter, broken skull, it's bad transcubic legs in limbs like. Just. Pointed you can't smell it. But dead body? Yeah, don't throw too much into. It, but you don't know whether or not that will or just the town itself. Or the dead smell somewhere. Dismount my. Body didn't smell that bad this. Morning. Yeah. He fell out of the sky. What is marked like, remarks the body like he he he fell out of the sky. The. Sky. What was he doing in the sky?

The the, the, the, the, the dread Lord he, he, he likes to play sometimes with his his food. Well, that's where the dead come. He he just drops them off ceremoniously into the into the void of the forest. And the fog carries their bodies where they will go. What? More often than not, they end up here. But so wait, he thought he Yeah, he's dead. I'm. I'm not to believe it's souls of the dead in this land cannot leave. Does it affect everyone or is it just the people of Borovia? Everyone who enters this, this, this, this land can, cannot, No, no.

What happens to people's souls when they die? The the the he looks to Soravia, who's like testing her strength, trying to lift up the car. They. I really hate it. I'm going to have to work with you now. They believe that the, the souls that they are the slaves to start will and so they they cannot, they're not allowed to leave. You know, this place, this, this horrible hellscape that is that we call home. There's no salvation to be found. Even when people die, you just get recycled. I think is the the the most appropriate term.

So where would Will's soul be going now? Will's soul, what's going on? Oh, I don't know how to tell you this man, I said. Like I ever put a head on a shoulder. Will's dead. He's, he's like, he's a crumpled pile on the floor. I. Can't imagine she gives a shit. She was horrible to him in life. Didn't mean I. Had you sort of grown fond of not fond? I mean, he was a thief. Used to I, I, I think my, my, my. In my mind it was like it you are a criminal, That's who you are. Doesn't mean I want you dead.

Oh no, what a shame. But we were also travelling companions, so, you know, I'm like, oh shit. Is is Mark this is. Oh shit. Or never mind. Delicate Would it be possible to put Wolf's body on top of your father's coffin and escort him to the to the Chapel? It's a bodybuilder. Sarovia looks over. There is plenty of room in the cart. You see, it's plenty of room, so it's it's fine. Could you please stop interrupting? Please don't leave my brain matter on the page like I need every part of me does. Anyone have a snow shot?

What? So everyone just laughs at you. She's having a great time. Ivan. Ivan. Yeah, smells. Could you lead me to the laughing one? OK, I I put a super tyre in your hand, like raise it up, just walk you slowly towards OK, you're about 3 foot in front of her. You could thrust. You probably get the No sorry. She moved. Sorry. I'm. Just dancing around you. You've got to find the joy in this. I I take it away something I've given you something so much more an appreciation for your breath. This is a great day, a great day you're going to.

Appreciate your breath you stupid bitch it. Could be worse, you could be your friend. I stab. Her I don't think that I've actually oh, you might have are. You actually rolling to stab her. She's helping. She's she's trying to get Will. Perfect, So she's busy.

As this chaotic scene ensues, I wonder. What is Mark and the reader are thinking about asking us for help now? I mean, it's just happy that the boat that her dad is being moved and is Mark is just waiting for his next drink. Does they seem OK with the Stony help? Could I like? Inside you can insight it, yeah. Apologise. In advance under the hiccups. There is. They're happy that the job is being done, and they kind of expected, they kind of expected that the help was going to be coming from the Bastani anyway because the Barovians don't like them because Straw targets arena.

So it's like, I didn't want your help, but I'm not exactly in a position where I'm going to say no about it. So yay, let's just get this done please. You did you miss what you. Did no I no, I tried to be professional and just like. I knew that the microphone would pick him up going, but I was like, you didn't. If you wanted to scare me, you should have made noise, but you just very quietly went I. Didn't want to interrupt him. So as this chaotic scene ensues, will you can see this Oh. You can. I'm watching them watch my corpse.

Yeah, you see all of this happening. I'm standing there with like my arms crossing like weight of one leg. Like I'm watching how it plays out.

And then then you hear it this like this really loud, like death knell. It's like a wing bell noise. That can't be good. And all of the spirits like that you see mulling around, they immediately stop and they all look toward the mountain that hangs over over you. It's like towards it's north, it's north facing island. So on 1st class you think they're all looking towards the church but then their heads kind of like tilt up and they all stare at the Castle Raven loft which you can now see very very clearly.

The fog is non existent to you in the in in the land, in the land of the in between as it were. Like you were not like a part of the fuck. Yeah, I. Get it? I'm dead. I understand you feel I'm as as you as you like. Follow the gaze upwards. You see this little pinprick of like red light and it immediately grows like it's almost as if like someone like very quickly like zinged in on an image and is just his like in the like a few feet away from you in the town he's watching. To quit Hank Hill.

He walks a few paces around Mass. I do love it when my vessels toy with the tourists that come to town. Pity that happened to her there. Like it's hilarious and he. Alter her hand. She could start people down. I go to the back of. My neck roll. He's Yeah. He strikes the back of Malice's neck roll. You don't know his neck roll. A perception check you feel. 8 All right, bye. Zip it away. It's 8. OK, You don't feel the hand, but you feel like wind, Passover, like the back of your hand. Would you? Would you just account for wind?

Yeah. I mean I'm a super on edge so I kind of like swat a flight away or something.

The hand as well as watching in like shock and like shock and. Are you? Not shock. No, this is just fucking typical. Rich, rich white man, isn't it? He's like the hand phases, yeah. Will's pretty much like, not impressive. Don't forget that. I gave her when they don't belong. I gave her a bundle of clothes and she was a Dick to me, so I'm not that bothered about Malik you gave. Me clothes and I am in a full gown. Yes, and one day you might need a change of clothes. I was a nice gesture and you were a bitch.

The. Fact you were. It came from a werewolf, you know. Doesn't matter, like I was trying to do something nice. She's a stuck up bitch and that's the bottom line. And so no, I couldn't give a toss that Strad's stroke on her neck. I'm just standing there watching like cool I want. To become a tan cart. Yeah, for sure, for sure. For sure, for sure. It's Strad going to become a hear me out, hear me out. He's a vampire. Hear me out. He's probably got lots of money and he lives in a castle. Yeah. Salt take my soul.

He doesn't want you for a concubine, so. Sometimes you just have to pay the price. I'm watching. He turns, he turns towards well, and then he half smiles. Will grins back. You are. You really are my favourite one. Thanks. You have an ignorant strength about you. I'm going to enjoy breaking that. I mean, you won't be the first to try it. He clicks his fingers and a door appears in front of you, and it's a door that strikes an A memory from your past. It's the door. From the it's the door. Of the orphanage you ran away from.

Right and. It opens up I. Take a step back. As you take a step back, the door comes closer to you. I take another step back. And on the other side of the door, you hear this faint, this faint whimper and this faint bark. And then it gets louder and then it gets louder and the whining and the crying begins to echo and reverberate inside your skull and the door take the door eventually takes over all of the all of the like your peripheral, like your frontal vision, so everywhere that you turn. There's the door.

You see, it's the door. Well, I guess I'm going through the door you. Don't have a choice you take as you take a step forward. The door falls and reality kind of like folds in over you. And when the when the light is restored, you are, you've heard the very first thing that you feel is you are cold and you are hungry and you're a lot younger than what you are or what you were when you came to Morovia. And you are back in the city of Neverwinter in the slums. It is in the middle of winter. What about the whimpering and the crying?

This is where you OK, You remember this like this is an event now. This is like a memory of yours that you're like being forced to relive. You're following this noise and you see a small shaggy grey little grey dog. Matchstick. With like a white stripe on his chest. It's matchstick because he looks like a burnt match. Who is being snared in a trap? Oh, Matchstick. Roll. To save matchstick I'm on it roll. To save matchstick. What do I add to it? What do I add? Sleight of hand 17 You succeed in trying the the snare trap loose from the back of his leg.

It's like, it's like a bad trap, but it doesn't have like spikes. It's just. Like a stitch. Like 2 like thick iron bars that have like jammed into the. Back of his leg. And then you hear as you like pride loose, you hear the uproar, the uproarious laughter of nobles from the the building that you like, from the building to your right. You know, like this anyway. And as you peer in through the window, you see like, that's like, like a banquet being laid out. Yeah. As you sneak in and magic kind of limps behind you, you you hear this door like a slight open, but it like gets slammed into a wall.

And when that when the door gets slammed into a wall, your legs crumpled beneath you, and you feel this splitting pain in the back of your head and you and you get back up and you're back in Borovia and the door is now farther away. Do I still have matchstick? Matchstick. That's so. Mean. Goes over to Ivan, the body salon, The Cut. I have done my part. Enjoy the new way of life I have given to you. It's my gift. Enjoy your Crick. My fingers in my ears and walk off. Don't know where I'm going.

Walking into a wall. Putting these fucking buildings everywhere. And she goes back into and she goes back into the Tavern is Mark and Irina is Mark takes up the, the, the car, the yeah row bar. I appreciate you've got quite a lot to carry now, but do you mind if I put lady on the cars as well? You're going to sit me on top of dead bodies? Enjoy my brain matter. You're stuck up, cow. You can you can see Irena by physically straining under the whale of the hand. Maybe I just a guide to it. Fine, where's?

Wait. No, no, no, no, no. What's the sister called? Irena. Irena And then I hold up my own.

God damn it, I'm. Pushing the car, I. Can't see. No, I put my. I put my hand on Ivan's shoulder again. Yeah, I guess I push the cut. I've been singing, so following the leader, the leader, the leader I'm. Freaking out, I was really hoping to impress. Don't be talking about brain matter in front. Of me. I was really hoping to impress Lady Arena, but it's all white cells. It's really, really terribly well. Like I got up a few of it's none of it's my fault, but it's gonna reflect badly on me nonetheless.

As you take up the car, you leave the the door, you leave the entranceway for the Tavern, and as you take up the car, you hear, you hear the you hear screaming and bellowing coming from behind you, which is further on down the road from here, which is what you heard as you walked up. Why is it? Following us or is it? It kind of like it stopped and then it started again. OK, whatever. This happens a lot in this town. People here are mad. Yep, I get to I fully understand that, but I'm it's not a gauge.

Let's just get go fast. Let's keep moving. Let's keep moving. Everybody keep moving malice on me. Come on very good look at Oh, there's a bump. Look out for the bump. We're going, we're going northwest now. OK, there's a bit of a turn. A bit of a 45° turn to the northwest. I always had somebody to tell me I. Tried explaining this to you the other day. I never needed to know. I was like, Alex, what hand do you write with? She's like my right hand. I was like, OK, so right is right and left is the other one.

And she was like, but what if you're left-handed? I was like, yeah, but you're not so it doesn't matter. I'm. Going to get Eleanor written on my hands the wrong way round. Probably the tattoo artist would be like you. Sure. Left tattooed on one hand. Right, Right. She's looking in the mirror when she does it. It's worth this. Video and I should drive itself in the mirror. Like that's how you should be holding your steering wheel. That's literally sometimes what I have to do. Get the letters written backwards as well.

That's perfect. If someone just goes that way and then points, I'm good. No, I need, I need a direct. I need like left or right and she's like, it's that way. I'm like. Point. We're on the phone. I can't see you.

The most we have a Dimitri Martin joke, a daily challenge. Give someone directions without using your hands. Sorry for that, just go. That way this.

Is chaos. As. You guys, as you guys move towards the church, I mean it kind of looks like to in Malice's direction is your is your friend OK? No, I believe she's blind. What did you mean, Will? Because there's got some other issues going on right now. Will's brain is leaking out of the back of his head. I'm pretty certain that was already doing that, I can't really remember.

That's my exact point about you. Cursed by the. Yes, she has. Let's suppose you could do anything about that. Can happen to a nice person. Father Donovich will be able to help you. He's he's the priest that we're not going to go see. He's going to be dead, thank the dawn. Thank the dawn. Indeed, Malik is. Really angry when she doesn't have a website. Yes, let's get back to nice, really polite, friendly malice.

Atop A slight rise against the roots of the pillar stone that supports Castle Avon Loft stands a grey, sagging edifice of stone and wood. This church has obviously weathered the assaults of evil for centuries on end and is worn and weary. A bell tower rises towards the back and a flickering light shines through holes in the shingled roof. The rafters strain feebly against their load as the as Malice and Ivan take your body up the hill, will you follow them? But every step that you take, the church is like 10 more feet further away, like the ground spreads out before you.

That's inconvenient. And when you eventually get to the general store, the ground like opens up beneath you and you kind of fall in. And when you when you hit ground, you hit like like a feathery, like really nice upholstered couch you kind of like sink into. It I didn't know what you were gonna say then as I don't like it. I don't like it. But if it's a couch, that's. Fine, it's couch that's. Nice. Yeah, comfy. And then when you, when you and then you look up and then you roll up perceptions here.

Nine, yeah. This building's familiar. If you didn't know any better, you would swear that you were in the building of the noble mistress Elizabeth of of Neverland. It was one of the IT was just like a random, random noble. This house was the one was one one of your first successful heists. Well, I'm probably not in a good position if I'm just chilling on the sofa. You hear Elizabeth singing in the washroom like 10 feet away from you when you're left. I go and take a peek. That isn't perfect. Like.

For five, it's a joke, I mean. It. Feels like me. He's about to say I peek you.

Roll slight hand. If it's not weird, why are we sneaking? If it's not weird, why are we rolling slider hands? Stealth made. Sense 20. OK, just as you, just as you remember it. You remember sneaking across, You remember sneaking across the floorboards. You've been in the house, this house, many times before. You know which floor, you know which Boards Creek and which don't. Matchstick is waiting at the windowsill and he has just successfully unhooked the latch and has like kind of nudged it with his nose and nudged the window open.

Who's a good boy? You. I know me a matchstick man. We'll go way back. You open the doors ever so slightly and, and when you peek on the other side, there is a like silver fox of a woman. She's mid 50s. So she's, she's standing up in this like very like grandiose like silver wash basin and this like comes up to like knee like knee high. And there are like 2 maids attending to her like they're washing down like her sides and her back. And she's performing this operatic piece, which I'm not going. To if I was the maid that would be so fucking annoying.

That's just shut up. And she like, she turns to her, she turns side. Tickling. She turns side on and like her face like this, like crow's feet, like there's like the beginning signs of like advanced ageing, as it were. Very, but OK, who the? Fuck is this. Going I've got advanced ageing. And as you like, take it in for a minute, peep and dumb you've been. I know you've labelled me as something. I am not You had your face when you say I'm going to take. A listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. If I'm having a quick look it's probably because of the naked lady singing opera in the middle of the bathroom whilst people wash her.

And if we're all being honest, that is a bit of a weird sight. You would be like what the fuck? Nibbles will do what nibbles do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. OK, well I don't like all the judgement. Thought you guys just wanted to hate me from the outside, no. That's right. I'm just going to edit. It's kind of all the bits where you defend yourself. So it's just you've been creepy and weird. I'm going to get a bad edit.

You can't edit all. You you close the door just as stealthily as you opened it and you go over to her night stand and there's this like giant necklace and it's like thick, like really big, like thick Ruby with like it's like being held in place by like golden like hands, like golden skeletal hands. And they'll on the knuckles of like the skeletal hands. There's like these little like diamonds. It's very, very like elaborate like neck piece. Why do you so? Poor because I'm assuming. You and as you like and you as you you pick that up off of the the like the neck bust like necklace holder thing.

Yeah. You hand it over to Maj Dick who like who puts in like obviously like takes out of you and you both as you both descend out and you jump out of the window. You then hear a guard whistle and you are chased through the streets. This is this is an event that you guys have done many times before. He is well versed in like jumping out of windows with you. OK and when you land on the outside in the snow of the and it's like the snow on the ground, you hear like God whistle and you both book it for the hole in the gate that you made a few months previous.

OK you when you get to the hole you feel a crack at the back of your head and when you look behind just to see what hit you, you then see 3 guards beating majestic trying to get the trying to get the like the necklace out of his mouth. You put out, you put out your dagger, and as you run to engage in combat, you take a step forward and then you fall again, and then you're. It's clumsy and I it's. Dark, dark, dark, dark, dark. Oh, it's cost a reasonable lot, this fog, the trees. Trees are buildings.

Why am I face down? I didn't fall face down. And you watch yourself fall into the ground, ow like you watch yourself like die. And you feel all of that like impact again. Ow I'm. Not going to scream because we're in your garage. Ow. Gurudio. Sorry, we're in the Gurudio. Gurudio back to me out. As we're rocking up to the church, I guess. You're on, yeah, you're on the. You're on like about hereish. How about the hands? Say Oh no. Do I move in the car? Like, am I back in my body? Oh, I'm not back in my body yet, no.

OK, hand on Will's chest as we're pushing the car along. And that's your prayer to the dawn. Father born Father, this is a mysterious place. Shroud them in darkness. But if you could find my friend's soul and either guide him to your embrace or send him back to us, we want to use his talents. That would be appreciated. Amen. Are you approaching? Do you approach the church doors? Yes, I guess, Yeah. If we've made it to the church, we'll go to the church doors. The heavy wooden doors of the church are covered with claw Marks and they are scarred by fire.

Fucking this straw's been here as well. It's nothing sacred, actually. This, this is the church is the morning mood, Yes. Is there anything on the outside? Any like windows or markings or decorations or anything that would suggest it's anything to do with the door farther? Not on the outside, no. The doors open to reveal a 10 foot wide, 20 foot long hall leading to a brightly lit Chapel. The hall is The hall itself is unlit and reeks of mildew. There are 4 doors, 2 on each side of the hall lead, which lead to adjacent chambers.

You can see that the Chapel is strewn with debris, and you hear a soft voice from within reciting a prayer. Suddenly, the prayer is blotted out by an inhuman scream that rises from beneath the wooden floor. I have been waiting for this. Oh gosh, it's still a good size. OK, Father Dornefich.

Yes. The fuck was that? That's none of none of your concern. Who? Who you. I know, I know. And I mean, I like waves. Father, My father, the burger master has been dead for three days now and we've only been able to now get him to the church. I need you to. Entirely. My dear sweet child. And he, he runs, he runs down from the, the Chapel to like the entryway of the hall and he got and like he embraces. Irena, you should have sent word. I would have. I would have gladly have helped you sooner. Slow head turn.

It's marked a shrug, of course. I would be more than I would be more than happy to facilitate with the the the final rights and the virtual. However, it must be done at dawn and it is only the afternoon, so you will have to spend one more night here. And he looks to the two of you. I'm. Staring at the dead bodies. Yes, it's not going to. Be I can hear you, I just. Yeah, the hand wiping tickets is going to work. My. Run in with the Fastani. I go. Yes. I bow forget that like I'm behind you, in your head, by your.

Shoulder. Oh what the fuck? Malice. Jesus Christ. You should say you had to run in with the the Vastani, my dear. How many fingers am I holding up? I don't know, dude. She can't see. I don't know.

I can I I I think I can I think I can help you. I would be with this. Extremely grateful.

And are you a follower of Father of the Dawn? Does it change? What happens if I say yes or no? No. If I say no, will you not help me? If you're not, if you're not a follower, then my rituals, they will not have any effect. I can't help you if you don't have faith. I have faith. Then we will begin conversion tomorrow at dawn. OK, Provided I mean times back to, I mean provided that you are willing to wait one more day for your father to be buried. I mean, he's been three days already. What difference?

Another day. Why I can only cast the rituals at dawn. I still need I need help. I do actually need your help. I my own my my back isn't what it used to be and you look like a strong and shopping man. Of course, I would be more than willing to facilitate the final rites in the the the funeral at the cello as well as helping your friend. But I can't take the grave. Would you be more? Would you be willing to assist with this menial task? No, Oh my God, I don't kid.

Yeah, shrug. I think of the grave. It's fine. We may be in need of further assistance actually, as you can see my friend Will here has had a. He's got a headache. You require a second funeral. No, I wonder if we could perhaps save him. He's not. Don't bury me. He's not actually from Borovia, however my understanding from talking to some of the people in town is that souls cannot escape from just size and grace, and I wonder if perhaps it's a way of recovering him. It is known that the souls of the recently departed can be returned to their body, however, this being a Church of the Father of Father of Dawn.

Let me guess, you can't do it till dawn it? Has to be a dawn, literally. Well, a religion advantage. 18. This the father the father of the dorm is what used to what your religion used to be known as before an event known as the Great Schism. This the the the Dawn Father's religion used to be a shared like Jwalahi religion. There was the morning Lord for the day prayers. Which is why I guess I am a member of the Church of the Dawn Father and you're a member of the Morning. No, same, same thing. The schism was for the night Mother.

There were the people who worshipped the the the Night Mother or the Mother of the evening. They believed they wanted to separate themselves from the Church of the Morning Lord. It didn't quite make sense to them that prayers and rituals before the moon and the night mother were to be said in the same places of like faith and worship as the the morning. So that was this great schism which led to a kind of like a small religious civil war that happened for like a few 100 years. This hasn't happened yet.

This this only happened like 2 or 300 years ago. You are way further back. Yeah, the the village of Baravia stuck like 700 years in the past, so this hasn't happened to them yet. But to you, this is like historic knowledge. A bit strange if you like. I'm going to internalise that for now. OK, I can go and take a grave for for the burg master, that's not a problem. Yes, Mark and Irena both pick up shovels as well, and they're like, this was our father Malice. Awesome Malice digs that hole somewhere else.

Malice wants to be helpful. Malice just picks up like a fucking breadstick or something like yes, where are we? Where are we digging? I. Smell like bread. Crusty shovel. So this is that's going. To be the name of my pub. Is there anywhere specific you need me to for the burger master? Anywhere on the church grounds would be fine. In the the facing West, that's where the other sun tends to rise. So not anywhere on the church grounds. As long as, as long as the grave is facing us.

What the? Fuck. Is that they said do that again. That is my son. Your son. What is the matter with your son? He's hungry. Because you say your son. What you. Speak louder. A few years ago my my son was tricked by a mage to go to the castle and this mage was killed and my son was returned to me as a a demon spawn Strat corrupted him and I've been praying for his safety and his saviour ever since. Strauss has corrupted your son. He has become one of them. Where is. He, he is. He is below you. Buried yourself.

Alive and he points he points to a door on the northeastern side. So like directly to what Directly to the east of you to the right view there is or there was like there was like a door and then the one in the one walk further off the corridor from that.

He's below us, then he's in there, he's in, he's in there, do. You feed. Him, he's, he's corrupted. He's a vampire. It's warm, presumably, so OK, it's going to be hard to sleep.

Presumably we're going back to is Mark and I know. There's bedrooms. Oh, we're going to sleep here. There. Is there is there are two bedrooms and an office? It's going to be very hard to sleep if he keeps doing that. Maybe give us some animal blood? Does that work? I don't know. Don't know which just stays blackly. What would you? Suggest you want. Me to aid this creature, I would much rather waste energy and. So you're just going to let him start and scream? Yes. I'm not sure we should be feeling with all.

Does your friend want her site restored? You shouldn't have that time for a guy who was more than willing to help you. I. Told you she's a stuck up cow. No, I'm not in a good mood, Yeah. I'm going to go and take a grin for the burger master. Your birthday. The wailing and the wailing and the pleading continue relentlessly. Donovich. Donovich returns to his prayers at the the Chapel. OK, I got outside and I find a pride spot, a grave. I get digging. I'm going to sit on a Pew. I I I carefully lower malice onto a Pew inside the church and then go outside.

And she's really just going to take in these screams, you know? I as I'm digging the grave, I just finally muttering to myself mire a prayer to the torn father I cared and just torn father. I need I need guidance. I'm, I feel out of my depth here. There's the creature strides, the devil. He's corrupting everything in this land beneath the church. Here there is a corrupted soul. I need guidance as to what to do. He's the son of a priest. I don't want to do anything too extreme, but it feels like something that should be dealt with.

I need, I need guidance. I need help preserving Will. Yeah, that's an 8. OK, as you continue, as you do after your, after your prayer, as you continue to dig the grave out, the, the, the wind picks up and the, the bell in the, in the charge tower, like it doesn't like sound off like it's not like a like a loud ring, but it's like the, the arm on the inside of it locks the bell enough for it to like vibrate. And through the humming, you hear this almost like authoritative voice. The priest is clearly mad.

He was insane. You are wise to want to intervene, stay true to your feelings, follow my teachings, slay the child, cleanse my church, and that's my friends is where we will end today's session. Sorry.

I don't think. I kind of creepy. I don't think I got a lot from this session. I mean, it's hard, OK? I'm dead you. You've got to do all your back story shit. I am working on it. OK I'll I will bring you back. Somehow I can't. I start frying bits of skull and. Brain. Memory. Anyway, yes, thanks very much everyone for listening. I've been your host, he's on my players. Hi. Fuck again. I'm Alex. Like. Comment Subscribe follow all of the all of the bears for the gramme and the Spotify we which we now actually have.

We have spot stuff for the Instagram coming up. Yeah, I put a couple of photos on. I put a photo of us in the Gurudio I. Was thrown off by you saying Armitage Shanks and they make toilets. Yep, Alex is trying to eat cucumber. Quietly, quietly. But we're only doing it during moments of silence. Delightful. So disgusting. Yeah. Yes, there's a picture of us in the Gurudio. There's the map of Panatheon that was made by our good friend Which mouse Wizards. Which mouse wizardry? Wizardry, yes, I apologise to get your name wrong.

I'll get that name. I have tagged the you know on Instagram though. So go to Instagram, look at our map and then follow the link to their Instagram and then get a map. So is. That give them a tip. So is that that's that's 609. On go yeah, go go to 609 DND at Instagram and then follow that link to whatever it was I said. Goodbye, bye.

E-mail at 609-d&[email protected]. That's it, bye. That's it. All right, catch you guys next episode. Bye gangster cucumber colour of it. Did we want this on? Yeah. Or is it? Oh. Yes, it's the other one still set up playing in the dark. You just have to plug it in. Plug it into work. Your laptop? Oh. I've got on the microphone. Oh no, we plugged it into the lamp last time, didn't we? Did it? Not. No, that's why. That's why we plugged it into the. Laptop and you're like Oh my God you gotta give otherwise everything's gonna form the universe fuck off there we go right better Oh we put it on the warm light do.

You wonder if she might sheet of paper. Take the lamp shade off of here. How does that work? So I reckon that would help. How do we? You have to take bulb out I think. How it's hot because it's been on do. You remember one stupid when we were kids and we lived in our old house, my dad, I was changing the light bulb in the garage because it hadn't worked for about a month and so it hadn't been on in over a month. He gave it to Matthew and won't be careful. It's hot. And Matthew went back and dropped it and it smashed everywhere.

He blamed me. It's got different, it should have different modes. No, Push the on button again. I would, child, you've met me. I sent you a text about my character because I don't want everyone else to.

OK. Just think. Remember to don't have to tell me. Just remember to make it happen. That's aggressive. No, no, we have. No. We've had discussions. We know what I'm doing.

I've also sent you a message about my character. Oh. God, I know. I'm blind.

Strahd 6: Out of Body Experience

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